.... Horrorscopes

....... Instead of writing your personalized predictions this week, I'd like to make some more "worldly" predictions. So sit back, relax, and plan the future of the free world along with me! Here goes!

Prediction #1 - We're all gonna die.

Prediction #2 - Taxes will go up very, very soon.

Prediction #3 - After taxes go up, coronary-related deaths will go up (also very, very soon.)

Prediction #4 - Cindy Crawford will get old, fat, and wrinkled.

Prediction #5 - You will get old, fat, and wrinkled (before Cindy Crawford.)

Prediction #6 - Your children will think you are Evil Incarnate. Your grandchildren will think you are the Federal Reserve Incarnate. Your great-grandchildren will think you are Primitive Man Incarnate.

Prediction #7 - The meek shall inherit the earth.

Prediction #8 - The righteous shall inherit the earth.

Prediction #9 - The meek and righteous shall fight over the inheritance of the earth on WWF Smackdown.

Prediction #10 - You will forget all of these predictions within 10 minutes of having read them.

See? That was fun! Now, go on with your silly little unimportant Stone Age lives :)...OR click on "Dear Aynnie" on to see what bad, terrible, horrific advice looks like!

Dear Aynnie

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